Dawn Loves Buttercups

It has been almost 5 months since I moved from Kent to Northamptonshire and 10 months since I left a marriage of 37 years. I have spent quite a while looking back on how far I have travelled not just in geographic distance, but in my spiritual growth. I am lucky in that I have had a very special “go to” person to listen to my ramblings, answer my questions and be a general sounding board in this regard, but I am my own person and also challenge myself to expand on my own resources. Overthinking had in the past been a difficult mind expansion for me to leave alone and I believe one of the reasons is because of our need to be in control of events going on around us in relation to our own place in the scheme of things.

One of the best things he reminded me of was The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.

1. Be Impeccable with your Word – oh how that zings all the way through in my thoughts, in my written word and my speech. How to be truly authentic in a minefield of expressing a view these days. One has to be so careful not to offend, but to speak or write anything but the truth is surely doing a disservice to oneself as well as the person, audience or platform you are reaching out to. We know that a thousand words can paint a picture, so it behoves us to remember that picture can be beautiful or ugly depending how we use those words. You see words are seeds and whether it’s our own internal dialogue or discourse with others, the picture we paint is the story we are telling ourselves and others. Maybe that’s why I am always clearing my throat or am prone to throat infections not because I don’t speak my truth, but that I am afraid to say some things and by not speaking out when I think I might offend or frighten away the person or audience so I leave unsaid that which I really want to set free

2. Don’t take anything personally – so hard isn’t it – to leave the ego aside and not feel that anything and everything is a potential personal attack! I still fall foul of this from time to time. Unless I remind myself that the person who I am speaking with or emailing or exchanging on social media with, has their own issues, totally unknown to me, that is affecting what they say and do, I fall back into “what do they mean”, “why are they being like this”. We really do have no idea what people are going through when they interact with us.

3. Don’t make assumptions – I still find myself doing this and of course these assumptions are based purely on how I think and/or react to something. Reminding myself how individual we all are and that it is true that “no two minds think alike” is one of the things I forget when I “assume” I know the answer.

4. Always do your best – for me this is probably the easiest of the Four Agreements. It doesn’t matter if you fall flat on your face, if its your very best effort then you know that tomorrow you can improve.

So what has this to do with how far I have come? ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING, they are reflected in every part of my personal and spiritual growth and when you look at them, these 4 are great tools with which to live your life .

In those months I moved 3 times, found my peace, visited Edinburgh where my ancestors originate (in fabulous company I might add). I’ve learnt so much about myself and what I desire in my life and what really matters. I take nothing for granted and remember to be open to whatever abundance Source has waiting for me whilst at the same time remaining ever grateful for what I already have and have received throughout my life. I’ve dug a pond (with help), put expression into my garden and began to really love myself. Love bumps and scars show part of the journey and my words and thoughts I share.

I came back to Northamptonshire with no expectations other than seeking a decent place to call home, and to be nearer my daughter. I hit the jackpot with a beautiful cosy little flat in the centre of a real “chocolate box” village with properties with thatched roofs and houses with roses round the door. I began to restore the garden and fill this place to go out from and come back to with love, light and pre-loved furniture that somehow whether bought or donated just fitted into my style and the way I knew I wanted my little home to look.

Making new friends in new surroundings is quite daunting even for an outgoing person like me, but it’s happened so naturally, this village is filled with genuinely kind and caring people.

Most importantly I know I can do what I want, where I want, when I want and with whom I want without asking permission or needing to plead my case. It’s very liberating and quite heady at times. Yet it’s a “peaceful easy feeling”.

Now the very best bit begins, I am becoming a travelling person again. I am so curious about this world we inhabit and love people watching, love being the observer. I am not only about to embark on visiting in Texas but also to deliver a workshop at a special educational needs centre run by a lovely friend, with a view to helping others in a time limited way admittedly, but nevertheless I know and am excited that what I have to offer could make a real difference in people’s lives. Knowing it is possible not only to carry out therapy treatments but to share knowledge in a practical way means that when I leave to come back to the UK, I hopefully will have helped empowered others to acknowledge stressors in their lives and have a tool box with which to deal and bring back a bit of life/work balance. Yes life is good, Yes indeed